sparks?

smiling languages eagerly,
i am sincere.
do you speak like i speak?
can you even see me?
in many ways i have gone blind. that's fine.

give me sweetness. find me a reason.
take my old thoughts. steal me a season,
away from clicking time.
i have no count. i don't count.

laughing comes between us,
i am light.
does your heart weigh more than mine?
can you even use it?
in many ways i have gone numb. that's dumb.

but for the little spark inside me waiting.
waiting for a reason to explode,
destroying my insides and outsides,
and all of the secrets they hide.

//

big blankets on a chilly night, snuggle tight
on both sides of my tiny body
i speak in rhythms but i don't know
at all what they mean to me

i remember things i want to forget
don't let that become me

cry tears of rain that never quite
materialize, salty like the water
that got in your eyes
when we spoke beneath waves

that day on the rocks, you were me
and i was you
i know it as the one time
we told the truth

come closer to me if you're not afraid
i'll touch your soft cheeks
empty from creativity

so what, i speak in rhyme sometimes
only because we need to touch the past
it's not enough going forward, i like
going back

oh, we go too fast
don't let that become me

i keep waking up each day
keep crawling out of bed
because when you stop doing that, you're dead
and the world will turn in circles
the world will turn in waves
so perhaps our times will touch again someday

.

Cursed with a love that you can't express
It's not for a fuck or a kiss

Rather give the world away than wake up lonely
Everywhere and every way I see you with me

Crowd surf off a cliff, land out on the ice
Crowd surf off to sea, float toward the beach

If you find me, hide me, I don't know where I've been

Are we breathing? Are we breathing? Are we wasting our breath?
It won't be enough to be rich

All the babies tucked away in their beds, we're out here screaming
The life that you thought through is gone
Can't wind down, the ending outlasting the mood
I wake up lonely

Crowd surf off a cliff, land out on the ice
Crowd surf off to sea, float toward the beach

If you find me, hide me, I don't know where I've been
When you phone me tell me everything I did
If I'm sorry you lost me you'd better make it quick
‘Cause this call costs a fortune and it's late where you live
It's late where you live

Rather give the world away than wake up lonely
Everywhere and every way I see you with me
All the babies tucked away in their beds, we're out here screaming
The life that you thought through is gone
Can't wind down, the ending outlasting the mood
I wake up lonely

Emily Haines - Knives Don't Have Your Back


















a night in county kerry

::

we always wanted to be together
and here we are far apart
i used to say that i loved you
before i even grew a heart

horses

i've seen two horses on the green countryside
one brown, one white
their home the salty coast
they watch the gray tide rise
they see the blue tide rise
i can see it in their eyes

a couple when it rains
they cuddle close
keeping each other warm
they'll stay together for all time
i can see it in their eyes
and they like apples

abcd...

She beckons to me- she destroys me
making coffees, and i make smiles
i'm a soft carpet and she's cold bathroom tiles

she's engulfed me with her eyes
so what choice do i have?
i'm seeing things as black or white
and i'm a shade of gray
i will never know her
i will never know what to say

i'm uncool to an impressive level
my dream girl doesn't exist
streaks of a pen and images of the night
she is a brief movement of my wrist

she glances over at me, and so i fall
she smiles in to me, and that is all
so life can go forward
nothing is different- i'm still free
the choices i have all scream
no one belongs to me
nothing belongs to me
everything loses its meaning

~~/~/~~

it feels like so long that i've been loving you
but we're still young, aren't we?
when we were colours, my passion made me red
and you were blue like the sea
when we were children, my legs moved so fast
that you could never catch me
now i'm a lost cause
a runner without the running
a poet without the poetry
a passionate lover without his deep blue sea
to swim away under
to love like no other